Yesterday, I brought you several examples of oinkers in Target's aisles and the "theory" that the store would be trading in their canine mascot for one with a pink, curly tail. I wanted to help the retailer find some products that demonstrate the power of the pig...so I headed to the thrift store.
Serve someone breakfast in bed on this thing to say "The rooster just crowed at the rising sun and this pig has been awake for hours rolling in the mud. Get your lazy ass out of bed!"
And I suppose it might delicately discourage overeating...
Ha! Subtlety is overrated.
Chef Pig doesn't have discriminating tastes -- ask your local mob boss -- but he sure makes that toque blanche look good. (You can see how excited I was with this find.) My only concern was Chef's empty arms. So I tried a few things...
I unfortunately didn't find anything more appropriate in the store to give Chef Pig, though he seems the perfect pedestal for an array of items like bacon packages or dildos (gosh, I can't imagine why I couldn't find either of those).
At this point, my attention was drawn to a holiday Billy Bass or novelty mug so thus ends the porky examples from yesterday's adventure. I'll keep my eyes peeled for more items to add to the pigpen.
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There once was a woman who lived in a shoe.