Thelonious turns Felonious

Tuned in to Thelonious Monk on Spotify right now and thought I might blog on some of the music paraphernalia I found thrifting.

...

Tangential thinking led me to follow another path and I now fear that a post with pictures and my long-winded exploration of a would-be autocorrect would wear out my audience. I'll move the pictures to another post so you can skip this babbling if you so desire. (Though you will have to wait another day or so before I take the time to post.)

...

To simulate a cyclical post, I would like to report that spellcheck prefer I take a listen to Felonious Monk.

All I came up with on Spotify was "Felonious Junk".

Google brought back

• a 2002 CSI episode
• a jazz-funk fusion group from Washington
• a comedian whose fifteen minutes of fame included an anti-Obama rant video and about 12 more minutes. 

A bit more research without any pre-determined endpoint led me to Twitter handle @Felonious_Munk, a user whose real name was reported to be "Wave Chappelle".

...And "Wave Chapelle" led me to three other "tweeters" claiming the same name (@Ambitious_Rome, @D_Gambiano, and @DerrockRose).

I stopped there, but figured I owed you the highlights of this voyage through the information superhighway. (Does anyone actually use that phrase these days?) So here goes (and then I'm off to read some more of The Gunslinger):


Listen to "Felonious Junk" and the entire Age of Empires 3: Original Soundtrack.

Check out CSI when you're looking for background noise or are just lazing around the house and reruns come on. Don't worry about tracking down the specific episode "Felonious Monk" as, despite an IMDB score of 7.9, this episode doesn't have any more or less twists than any other episode. Your efforts to locate this specific episode would be a waste of two minutes on bit torrent sites that you could be spending acquiring Game of Thrones. (Not that I'm condoning any of these activities.)

If you're in Washington for whatever reason and these guys happen to be playing in a restaurant you and your girlfriend happen to have walked into, by all means stay and listen. But their Facebook page doesn't motivate me to choose them over another jazz-funk fusion group.

If you've got three minutes to spare, are sick of cat videos, and are feeling particularly anti-Obama, check out this video. You might also consider looking up the clip if you get a kick out of muting passionate speakers and speaking for them (a la MST3K).

@Felonious_Munk (Wave Chappelle 1) is most likely to be the anti-Obama comedian. He is the only one of the four Wave Chappelles with anything worthwhile to say. Sure, the good stuff is peppered with inane musings, but considering the reverse is true on my blog, I figure he's doing pretty well.

• White people actually get offended when u use the "white voice". They immediately say "I don't sound like that"...because...they don't.
• Most unfortunate thing...if we only accept truth presented positively, you end up with politicians. Hope. Change.
• Btw... My dream was to wake up and eat breakfast food...and as I crack open these organic eggs...I feel successful
• Why not choose education over the nicest shoe/console for your child? Yes, they can have both, but in impoverished areas is that what u see?

@Ambitious_Rome (Wave Chappelle 2 on Google results, currently Flake Griffin on Twitter) demonstrates his wisdom in his personal slogan: "Chris Brown my Cousin, Ocho Cinco my Uncle, and the Bus Driver my Dad, I know how to treat Women. God is good and life goes on." If--like me--you're unable to pull your eyes away, I advise you to check out a few tweets.

• {Various tweets in real-time about Heat basketball games}
• If it wasn't for Nelly.. Hip Hop would have been died..
• about to watch Hangover 3
• it's macaroni time
• no she called me sucio
• Only if i had the same number of Twitter folllowers as my Instagram..
• I like them girls, with them booty cheeks. Especially big, round, and soft like bounty sheets
• Kesha - Die Young >>>>>>>>>>>..

@D_Gambiano (Wave Chappelle 3) has 377 followers, most likely because his profile background is a topless shot from the bath scene of Coming to America. Here are just a few of the over one-hundred tweets he made today:

• I never shined on my family cuz that usually breeds envy
• I'm not surprised your ass hating cuz that's the shit lames do
  ["your ass" hating or "you're ass-hating"? Also, isn't "lame" pretty un-PC these days?]
•  I swear a nigga is vexed when it comes to this love shit
• Girl flex, time to have sex.
• I'm blown cuz I missed the last 2 episodes of bleach so idk wtf is goin on....where tf is Izen?

@DerrockRose (Wave Chappelle 4) is some 21-year-old* kid whose "followers" are acquaintances from high school and select family members who are privy to his potty mouth. He does a lot of twittering (to) himself and his most poignant tweets are quotations whose author is presumably Anonymous (whoever that guy is). A few noteworthies:

• Yo tan ain't real so what that say bout your heart
• All of a sudden you're a shoehead
  [What the...is a "shoehead"?!]
• Customers be confiding in me at work. Bruh I'm just tryna download an app for you
• As you grow up, you start realizing shit. Like how the homie since elem. days Kevin was one of the biggest fronters ever in HS ahaha
  [Deep Thoughts by Wave Chappelle 4]
• Making and spending PayPal money
  [Look who's ballin'!]
• It could all be so simple
  [Lauryn Hill fan, are we?]
• Really can't drink the way I used to
  [You mean, illegally?]*

I hope you've enjoyed trolling complete strangers with me. Perhaps we'll try this again sometime.